HEY GAIZ! GUESS WHOSE MOTHER JUST CONVINCED HER TO SPEND LIEK $$90 ON SWIM WEAR?!?!?!!?! UMMM.....ME!


Yeah.....so mom and I were at Target killing time before she had to go into work. I'm never going shopping with that woman again. We were looking at swim suits because I keep getting invited to go to people's pools and stuff, but I don't have a swim suit because, well, I can't swim. Can't swim--why bother with a swim suit? I figured I could get one and then I could at least sit on the edge of the pool and look gross whilst dangling my feet in the over-chlorinated water.

I FOUND AN ITSY-BITSY TEENEY-WEENEY YELLOW POLKA-DOT BIKINI. AND IT FIT.

And thus, my problems.

Because then I realized I did not have a bag suitable for going near that much water. And there is no way my towel (and book) is going to carry itself. So I picked out a cute little tote. And then a hat caught my eye. But I was a good girl, and said, "Noooo....I don't think I'll get that because it's kind of ridiculous, and while I certainly have no problem with that, I shouldn't be spending that much money." See?!! I'm a GOOD GIRL. I'm a RESPONSIBLE GIRL. I don't just BUY THINGS for the SAKE of going on some CRAZY SPENDING SPREE.

But then my mother chimed in.

"Oh come on, Megan. Indulge yourself a bit. Use your credit card."

So I put the stupid hat on and started to walk away. But then, SHE OPENED HER MOUTH AGAIN.

"Don't you need a cover up or some thing like that, Megan?"

I should have said, "No, mom. I do not need a cover up. In fact I do not need this hat, because it is ridiculous, and I do not need this bag, because I can carry my own towel in my arms, and I am a poor college student working only twenty hours a week at a minimum wage job. I do not need any of these things. I also do not need a swim suit this expensive, even if it does open up a world full of musical possibilities. I am not buying any of these things and now I am going to go find myself a clearance rack swim suit."

Instead, LIKE AN IDIOT, I said: "Sure mom! You're right! I deserve to go crazy every once and a while. I work hard! XDDDD"

So I grabbed a little cover up thingy.

And then my mom OPENED HER MOUTH AGAIN.

"Well don't you want a yellow towel to match that?"

And LIKE AN IDIOT, guess what I did?

I said, "LIEK OMG YOU ARE SOOO TOTALY LIEK RITE MOM. XDDDD"

So we went and got a towel.

And then we went to check out.

And as the total was climbing higher and higher and higher AND HIGHER, guess what I DIDN'T DO. I DIDN'T put anything back. LIKE AN IDIOT I SWIPED MY CREDIT CARD AND WALKED OUT LIKE SOME RICH BRAIN DEAD HOOKER.

Well, guess what.

I am not, in fact, a hooker. I am much too modest to ever go into that kind of profession. I'm embarrassed at the thought of even wearing a SWIM SUIT out in public. I am also not rich. I am, in fact, a poor college student working a minimum wage job and only about twenty hours a week, sometimes less than that. BUT APPARENTLY I AM BRAIN DEAD. ESPECIALLY SINCE, INSTEAD OF DRIVING BACK AND RETURNING EVERYTHING I AM NOW "BLOGGING" ABOUT IT AND, AFTER FINISHING THAT, WILL PROMPTLY GO AND CUT THE TAGS OFF EVERYTHING.

Why? you may ask. Megan, you will say, you are not this crazy money person. You make Ebenezer Scrooge look like a spendthrift.

Well...

IT'S BECAUSE MOMMY SAID IT WAS OKAY. Or at least, that's what I'm claiming....

And you should have seen my mommy's face as we were picking all of this stuff out. I know she feels bad because she can't afford to buy my brother and me anything on a whim, or even at all. And I could just tell how happy she was that I was able to get all these nice things. And it makes me feel guilty for staying home and mooching off her when I know she needs the money.

And she just looked so happy that I was getting new things.

I hardly ever buy new things anymore. I always get my things from HAAM and GoodWill. I've even bought most of my lolita clothes secondhand. And I don't mind. I really don't mind. I prefer buying things used because it's cheaper and I am, indeed, stingy.

But then I see her face, and I know she wants me to have shiny new things.

So I bought shiny new things. And she looked so happy.

So why do I still feel like I did something wrong?