In a few minutes, National Novel Writing Month 2007 will be over. Yet another chance at reaching 50,000 will have slipped through my fingers. I had felt so confident that I could reach my goal this year, and I'm not insanely angry or anything that I've not reached my goal (I did have a "valid" reason) but...

I don't know...

I had just been doing so well; I had been so confident that I would complete my novel this year. Looking back, I feel a bit of regret I'm not going to win this year. I mean, I am going to finish it...but I'm not going to touch it until after I get done with finals and everything. I want to have it done by the end of January...it's just so strange. I had been so close, and now it's just slipped through my fingers. I'm vaguely disappointed.

BAH! But I'm returning to school on Monday. Blech...maybe that's what's got me in such a state.

I just...I can't get over the fact that in a few hours it's going to be December. December! December, and I'm still wearing short skirts and light cardigans. December, and I'm leaving my house sans bright red pea coat. December, and I have yet to pull out my weird pseudo-Himalayan hat with the huge pom on the top. December!

I remember when I was a child and we would all be clad in coats long before Thanksgiving. I remember as a child, worrying about being too cold when I went trick-or-treating. I remember when I was really young and the whole city froze over and dad and Chaney and I played outside all day in the ice.

I remember two years ago when Sophie (and most of the population) was able to wear shorts on Christmas Day.

I miss the way things used to be.

Also, I think I may be Bennett's only friend. I thought it was kind of weird that he was at the hospital everyday when I was there...but then he started showing up at my house too. It turns out he's having some family troubles and I'm the only one (besides his shrink) that he feels comfortable talking with about it. I don't mind helping people out with their problems...but you can't honestly expect me to be on call all day everyday. I kind of want to tell him he needs to suck it up and just accept that his parents do not see things the way he does and that he's living under their roof and so he doesn't have a say in that but then I feel bad. I mean, I have this great social network filled with family and friends that I can rely on...he has no one.

But I just CANNOT deal with constantly having to counsel him at all hours. Normally people get paid a lot do this stuff, but here I am, doing it for free for someone I'm not even that close to. And it's not like I hate him...I'm just not that great of friends with him.

Also, today I discovered there exists a Geek magazine. That's the actual name of it. Geek. I love it. I think I'm going to subscribe.

Ah, but onto today. TODAY. I went out today. And not only did I go out, I DROVE. My mom and I went to the mall (!) and then we went to Blockbuster and then we went home. I'm just so ecstatic that I went out today.

Haha...and Beth makes me laugh. And I need some yarn for the amigurumi I want to give out. ♥~

Have you ever played that game--the one where one person will say, "The good thing is _____" and the next will say "The bad thing is ________" and the next will continue with "The good thing is ______" and so on and so forth? Well, here's my version of it:

( The good thing is, the bad thing is... )

Haha...but speaking of Alex, every time I see him I think of that Regina Spektor song "Samson" and that makes me think of the Plain White T's song "Hey there Delilah" and then that makes me think about Alex and some random rocker-chick girlfriend that he apparently has in my head singing those songs to each other. And then I laugh out loud and everyone stares at me weirdly..... ^_^;

My air conditioner is fixed, so that's good.

I'm going to miss all of the people leaving, so that's bad.

And, (ugh) I start my classes on Monday. Blech. I don't want to go back to school, I just want to stay home and not do anything. But, on the bright side, I have an interview at the college tomorrow for a job. :D Which is very good because I need to start working again (which, in itself, is BAD because I have gotten very lazy and bum-like over the summer).

Haha...I saw the second Death Note movie, accidentally thinking it was the first. I felt really stupid after the fact, but I did like it.

( Several Also's )

( Chicken and Egg Roll )

I had fun. I don't get to see anyone that much lately. I've always joked about being a hermit during the summer, but I think I really did fulfill that this year (although it wasn't quite by choice). It makes me kind of sad, really.

( Semi-kind of rant thing...don't read it if you're just going to bitch me out about it, I'm not in the mood today. )

I want to make this next year different. I want to honestly change. I just...I don't think I know how. I'm stuck in my ways, I guess, and that makes it hard to grow.

....when I was a little kid....

( (It's mostly in order) )